Predators

It has been said, on Family Guy, that a film starring Adrien Brody was a way to NOT get people to watch it. However, Predators is contradictory to this theorem. Brody along with Topher Grace (That 70's Show), Laurence Fishburne (Matrix), and Danny Trejo (Machete) fill out a cast of soldiers mysteriously brought to a planet to be hunted by a triad of predators that are more ruthless than in the Schwarzenegger days.

By slapping an 'S' on the end of the old title, the new film can be allotted free reign on a storyline that consists of being hunted and hunting people. This film in NO way follows the path of the older version and does not coincide with the Alien vs. Predator films. Explosions, guns, blood, dirt, fire, fear....a guy film. I was as entertained as I was watching Arnie fight off the aliens but this one had better cinematography, better effects, and some nice fight scenes that kept me wanting more.

Elementary Grading Scale: Exceeding Expectations

1-10: 8/8.5

Monsters

A film very reminiscent of Cloverfield, Monsters tells the story of a man and woman trying to escape an alien infested area of Mexico. 6 years into an invasion, the U.S. border is populated by huge octopus-like creatures that have a mean streak. Sam and Andrew struggle through aliens, price-jacking smugglers, and eerie situations as they try to get back to the "real world".

I liked this film but there were too many moments that I had to wait to enjoy the show. The aliens were cool, much like a fleshy version of the aliens from the Tom Cruise version of War of the Worlds. I would have to say that this was just a time-filler movie for me. There have been much better movies about aliens... Predators for instance....I dont know what else to say really. Maybe if there were zombies in it too I would enjoy it more...

Elementary Grading Scale: Needs Improvement

1-10: 5

Circle of Fury

A low budget film that targets guys who are in need of a fight movie. Drugs, underground fight clubs, and revenge. The perfect storm of movie subjects to make guys come-a-runnin. Unfortunately, the film lacked flow, acting, and cinematography to back it. I appreciate what they were trying to do. A U.S. army vet returns home, homeless and reunites with his best friend. Unknown to him was that his best friend became the cities most notorious drug dealer and illegal fight promoter. When all the secrets come forth, the friendship ends and the stress level rises as friends become enemies and drug dealers do what they do best....kidnap girlfriends, punch adversaries, and challenge ex-best-friends to all-or-nothing fights for what is theirs.
You know whats goin on now....what do you think? Sound exciting. I think it can peak SOME interest...but like I said, there was not enough cash going into this film to bring it to the level that it needed to be to be viable....

Elementary Grading Scale: Needs Improvement
1-10: 5

The Sorcerer's Apprentice

A friend of mine told me to watch this film and I had been hesitant before the prodding. Afterall, the only film I had seen previously with the same name, was a Disney musical with no words. Not my "cup o' tea". Knowing this was a Jerry Bruckheimer film. Knowing this was a Nicolas Cage Film ('Knowing' is a film that Nicolas Cage was in too). I had a certain idea what I was in for. A cross between Pirates of the Caribbean and National Treasure with an actor with the charisma of an eggplant. Now just throw in a dusting of a Harry Potter(ish) story and you have the film I am speaking of NOW. Fortunately, these ingredients make a pretty palatable dish. I like this film for what its worth... pure entertainment with some twists and great special effects.
If you enjoy fantasy, fairy tales, adventure, and eye popping excitement then you should check this film out when it comes to DVD.

Elementary Grading Scale: Progressing Satisfactorily
1-10: 7.5

Machete

Robert Rodriguez has written a script, whose storyline originates from the Mexican film world. Machete is not a new idea. Originating in 2006, Machete is a story of an ex-federale who after witnessing his family murdered because he would not succumb to bribes from the big time smuggler on the border of Texas and Mexico, goes to America in an attempt to live in peace, but finds himself right back in the middle of it all. With the help of his friends, an undercover customs officer and a disguised taco truck saleslady, they go on a rampage to get the justice they are searching for. A justice that gives rights to the struggling Mexican community.
By the way, I would like to tell you the cast line up of this...quite a crew! Danny Trejo (his first starring role I might add), Robert DeNiro, Jessica Alba, Steven Seagal, Michelle Rodriguez, Cheech Marin, Don Johnson, Lindsay Lohan, and Jeff Fahey who plays Trejo's nemesis, Booth.
Rodriguez and Quentin Tarrantino rely on blood and gore to intensify the films they create. I relate Rodriguez as well as Tarrantino as modern day rap stars. They take old films (songs in the rappers case) and "re-make" them into a modern day film (beat). Not being known for originality, they often take their favorites scenes from older films and tweak them to enhance their own films, usually with just more violence. Knowing this, in my opinion, still left me entertained by this film. The film is made with a low-budget, 70's film which uses a continuous flow of action to keep the viewer glued to their seat. If you have a weak stomach, then do NOT watch this film. ie) Trejo is able to swing down to the floor below him by jumping out a window clinging to the large intestine of a criminal he stabbed with his machete..... need I say more.... going into the film knowing that everyone is an actor, being paid to pretend it is real life, MAY help you absorb and move on from a scene like that.... :o{)

Elementary Grading Scale: Progressing Satisfactorily
1-10: 7.5

p.s. - I would like to thank my Uncle John for pointing out the use of old story lines used in Tarrantino's film......

Resident Evil: Afterlife

The fourth film in a series of Zombie films created from the hit video game, Resident Evil. Milla Jovovich again plays Alice, a super-human being created to eliminate the un-dead. As Alice eliminates zombies infected with the notorious T-virus, she is also on a quest to understand the Umbrella Corporation. To any "real" gamer, this is all old news ( I have a feeling many of my followers would be considered "gamers")(no offense). Anyway, Alice teams up with a former killer of the undead, Claire (Ali Larter) who after an attack loses her memory of her life, friends and family. Resident Evil: Afterlife is a 90 minute adventure with great fight scenes, new killer zombie hybrids, and a cool cinematic approach as this film was created for three dimensions.
If you have followed through my reviews for the last couple years, you know I am partial to zombie flicks. This film, along with the other R.E. chapters, are a great "quadrilogy". Though each is similar, most people watch this type of film to see bullets blowing zombies heads off in new and interesting fashion. This film gives you new types of zombie along with clever ways to dispatch these evil creatures. I approve of this film.

Elementary Grading Scale: Exceeding Expectations
1-10: 8

Stay Cool

Sean Astin (Rudy, The Goonies, Lord of the Rings) plays a gay guy. Astin as far as I have read and seen, has always prided himself on his roles and his professionalism. I think that his role of Sam, Frodo's "super close friend" almost made him make the next step in his acting career. He threw his credibility out the window in this film, Stay Cool. He plays a stereotypical, flamboyant, boa-wearing gay guy working at a hair salon. And, this has NOTHING to do with the main story...I was just taken aback. Really the story is about a nerd-turned-successful author, Henry McCarthy (Mark Polish) and goes back to school to give the commencement speech in his hometown. His book, dealt with the "girl who got away" and after returning home he was confronted by his "dream girl" (Winona Ryder). All the while, a girl at the school (Hillary Duff) has the hots for him and asks him to Prom which he never had the chance to go to as a high-schooler. Old feelings and regrets haunt McCarthy as he battles with what he should do and what he wants to do. A cameo appearance by Chevy Chase as the school principal adds to the comedic aspect of the film.
A bit unrealistic and an over-dramatized story of circumstances that would never REALLY happen, fill this story. Any grown man would have the wits about him to turn back on some of the decisions he makes. An unrealistic lack of judgment infected the film and turned this story into an almost "fairy tale". There was an entertaining aspect of the film... the idea of going back to your hometown only to see everyone still moving through the town embarrassed to still be stuck there was a funny tweak to the storyline.

Elementary Grading Scale: Needs Improvement
1-10: 5

Twelve

A young drug dealer (Chase Crawford) turns to a life of crime after his mothers death. As his life goes downhill, his life is dismantled in the wake of his cousin's murder, which sees his best friend arrested for the crime. Crawford plays a drug dealer to the upper class NYC student scene as he crosses between the elitist, arrogant and entitled youth of Manhattan and the slums of Harlem to collect what the rich kids so dearly crave, Twelve. Twelve is a new drug and drives kids into deep addictions and eutopic stupors. After a birthday party for the "most popular girl in school", things go wrong after a combination of drugs, misunderstood teens, and a troubled sibling combine into a tornado of misfortune.
I was captivated by this film. Keifer Sutherland narrated the film and did an excellent job of bringing the emotion into the scenes. 50 Cent plays a ruthless drug dealer and Rory Culkin plays the kid in school desperately trying to find his niche and find his place in the social status of his fellow classmates. I have never been in any of the crazy circumstances portrayed in this film but I think the film did a good job of portraying what it really would be like. The film as a whole I can say takes a good look at the effect of a loss of a parent on a child. If not handled correctly, things can spiral fast. The feelings seemed real and though the story was "extreme", it was able to be followed and enjoyed.

Elementary Grading Scale: Exceeding Expectations
1-10: 8.5

The Switch

This guy(Jason Bateman) likes a girl(Jennifer Aniston). The girl just thinks of him as a friend. The girl moves away after a very awkward disturbing thing the guy did, unknown to the girl. The girl moves back but has a new boyfriend. The guy still loves her and finally convinces her that she loves him too. Want a more in depth story...ok. An unmarried 40-year-old woman turns to artificial insemination to get pregnant. Seven years later, she reunites with her best friend, who has been living with the secret that he replaced her preferred sperm sample with his own.
Have you ever heard of this story? I have. 1000 times. Not the minor details but the outline. Most romantic comedies follow this basic formula. Of course there were a few extra spices thrown into the mix like a child, a sperm donor, and....thats it. To be completely up front with you readers, I fell asleep for 30 minutes during this film...there MIGHT have been something completely interesting while I was sleeping..but I would bet that it stuck close to the normal storyline of EVERY film of its genre.... The kid in the movie was good. That's all I got.

Elementary Grading Scale: Progressing Satisfactorily
1-10: 6.5

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

Scott Pilgrim must defeat his new girlfriend's seven evil exes in order to win her heart. After a fairly easy break up with his "under-aged" girlfriend, Knives, Scott (Michael Cera) becomes smitten by a new girl, Ramona, played by Mary Elizabeth Winstead. Unfortunately, she brings along some baggage in that her 7 ex-boyfriends are ticked off and want to crush Pilgrim. Thus, unrolls the saga of a fight for the hand of Ramona. A video game world of points, extra lives, bonuses and humanly impossible fight moves develops so that Scott Pilgrim can reign victorious. Along the way, he learns valuable lessons about himself and what really matters.
I was happy to see that it was the marketing team of this movie that was at fault, as opposed to the movie itself. The commercials I saw failed to interest me ( I was taking one for the team when I chose this one. JUST so I could tell my readers. You're welcome). The movie ended up being less cheesy than the ads, still had its fair share of eye rolling scenes, but was fast paced enough to make me forget about those moments as they moved on to the next "level". The music was not my type of rock. I think you would have to be a fan of indy bands like The Hives to really appreciate the soundtrack, but overall, it's worth a rent or a download. Don't waste your time sitting at a theater.

Elementary Grading Scale: Progressing Satisfactorily
1-10: 6.5